A maths professor sent a sms to his wife. Dear you are now 54 years old and unable to satisfy me. Now I am with my 18 years old female student so I will be late tonight.
Wife replied: dear you’re also 54 years and unable to satisfy me. Now I am with our driver who is also 18 years. As you are mathematicians you know very well that 18 goes into 54 many times more than 54 goes into 18 so don’t come tonight.
Boy: aunty why was uncle lying on you last night?
Aunty: he was checking my temperature.
Boy: did he get it right? I saw the thermometer leaking.
A few quotes on girls t-shirt:
there s a face above this, don’t forget.
Object here appear bigger than they are.
I made you look at it.
F ck all that is missing is u.
Don’t try to find sun here, its not mountain. This one is really tough for Edmund Hillary.
Dad brought a robot which slaps a person who lies.
Dad: son, where were you?
Son: School, robot slap. Son: film.
Dad- which one?
Son: sai baba, robot slap again. Son: “A” film
Dad: what? I have not seen such films, robot slaps dad.
Mom: forgive him dear after all he is your son, robot slaps mom.
A boy wanted to have sex with girl friend ashamed of his small sex organ decided to bring girl friend in dark place opened his zip and put his sex organ on girl friend hands.
Girl friend: No thanks, I don’t smoke.
Boy saw a lady with big breast.
He asked her: can I bite them for $1000?
She says: ok they go to a secluded corner. She opens her blouse.
The boy kisses, licks, puts his face in them, presses them hared for 10 minutes
Lady asks: aren’t you gonna bite them?
He replies: no, it’s too costly.
Who’s guilty? Wife dreaming in the night suddenly shouts “quickly my husband is back” man get up, jumps out of the window and realizes, dammit I am the husband.
A boy and animal went to river to take a bath. As he removed his clothes all animal laughed at him.
He asked: why are you laughing at me?
Animals: your tails in front.
Teacher: explain responsibility.
Student: mam your blouse has four buttons, if three buttons break down the entire responsibility will be on the fourth one.
Officer: madam swimming is prohibited in this lake.
Lady: then why dint you tell me when I was removing my clothes?
Officer: well, that’s not prohibited.