Day: March 16, 2012

 Funny quotes

You know that indestructible black
box that is used on airplanes? Why
don’t they make the whole plane out
of that stuff?!

 Jokes at work

A well respected Doctor and his wife were having drinks in the lobby of the theater during the opening nite of a musical during
intermission. A blonde shimmied by that had to have had what there was of her evening gown spray painted on her curvy body.
She smiled and gushed, “Well, hello there Doc.” and kept right on going.

After a moment’s pause, the good doctor looked at his wife and said, “Don’t worry dear, that’s just a young lady I know
professionally.”

Without missing a beat, his wife asked, “Hers or Yours ?”

 Political joke

HOW TO START EACH DAY WITH A SMILE….

1. Open a new file in your computer.

2. Name it ‘Barack Obama’.

3. Send it to the Recycle Bin.

4. Empty the Recycle Bin.

5. Your PC will ask you: ‘Do you really want to get rid
of ‘Barack Obama?’

6. Firmly Click ‘Yes.’

7. Feel better?

GOOD – Tomorrow we’ll do Nancy Pelosi!

 Thanksgiving joke

There was a family that had a parrot that was always embarrassing them by cussing and other stuff like that.

So one day the boy took the parrot and stuck him in the freezer.Two hours later the squawking stopped.

The kid checked the freezer and the parrot said, “Okay I’ll stop cussing, but I have one question”.

The boy said, “What”?

The Parrot asks, “What did the turkey do”???

 Redneck jokes

So there were three rednecks walking down a country road. They find a dead opossum that was ran over.

The 1st redneck says, “that there looks tasty”!

The 2nd redneck says, “I don’t much like opossum.”

The 3rd redneck says, “I’m a waitin for something better.

So… the 1st redneck eats the opossum.

Then, down the road they find a dead rabbit.

The 1st redneck says he’s full. The 2nd redneck says he likes rabbit and the 3rd redneck says he’s still waitin for something better.

So… the 2nd redneck eats the rabbit.

Further down the road the first two rednecks who ate the opossum and the rabbit start barfing like crazy.

The 3rd redneck says, “Finally, a nice warm meal.